Thursday, April 20, 2006

When to be "Just Hubby"

We are not 24/7.
We play when we are in the mood. Sometimes I will drop a word or two and she will pick up on it and get into the role. Sometimes it's the other way around. I've tried to seperate our roles in play with our roles in ... geez I want to say "normal" life, but that's just not right. Vanilla? I'm not a big fan of that word either. Traditional? Hmmm. Nope not that, but you get my meaning. How about Non-Power-Exchange Dynamic. Too long to type but I digress.

So I have tried to not place a burden on everyday tasks like dishes, cooking, general household stuff that needs to get done. I emphasise needs to get done, not needs to get done with a buttplug up her ass and high heels and a slave collar around her neck.

Now she has been broken for a while, so play has not occured. Sex? With the chemistry going on in her body lately that has not been happening. So there has been a little frustration on my part. Partly because I've been backed up, but MOSTLY because of worry and concern over her health. She on the other hand has been tired, cranky, in pain and irritable.

Well she flipped out last night. Cranky, tired, irritable, all she wanted to do was go to sleep. All I wnated form her was to finish folding the last load of laundry she asked me to bring up. After the 5th prompting from me, she jumped up and flipped out screaming and yelling that all she wanted to do was to get to sleep and for me to stop prompting her to fold the clothes.

So should I drop everything, grab her and pull her over my knee and spank her ass red? Boy a part of me really wanted to do that. Grab her by the scruff of her neck and force her to finish up the clothes before letting her go to sleep. But this was exectly the wrong time to try something like that. We were not "playing" that evening. She was not being bratty. She was exhausted, out of it, and irritated. So, silently I folded up and put away my clothes, leaving hers on the bed and left. She needed to get sleep, she needed a husband, she needed no more conflict that evening. I gave it to her.

This morning, she apologized for her behavior. Not as slave, but as wife. She explained why, and I accepted her apology, not as Master but as husband. As a partner living and spending my life with another partner. Could I have "punished" her? Yeah. I didn't. That would feel more like abuse than punishment. Real world issues happen, those don't and shouldn't translate over into play. Even smacking her ass this morning was not an option for me. I was still a bit rankled by her actions, even though I understood it and accepted her apology, my ego still was smarting. Laying hands on her in an aggressive way would be feeding the wrong emotions. I would be doing things for the wrong reasons. So vanilla happened instead.

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